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New Lohan Sister Just As Fame-Spazzed As All Other Lohans

Posted July 2nd ago via Hecklerspray
1 Fafarazzi Point for each celeb mentioned in this post:

Lindsay-Lohan
» Profile Fafarazzi.com Profile of Lindsay Lohan
Dina-Lohan
» Profile Fafarazzi.com Profile of Dina Lohan
Michael-Lohan
» Profile Fafarazzi.com Profile of Michael Lohan
Ali-Lohan
» Profile Fafarazzi.com Profile of Ali Lohan




The following is a portion of the full post
Images and full post at Hecklerspray

OK everyone, you can put the nature vs nurture debate to bed now - the newly-discovered illegitimate half-sister of Lindsay Lohan proves that it's definitely nature.

Why? Because even though 13-year-old Ashley Kaufmann - the girl apparently sired by Michael Lohan during a month-long affair - was raised in a completely separate environment to Lindsay Lohan and Ali Lohan, she's still labouring under the mistaken belief that she's going to be a huge pop star.

According to reports, Ashley Kaufmann is busy trying to crack the music industry and has already made a number of approaches to record companies. Poor Ashley Kaufmann - we wonder if she's realised that she's genetically predestined to end up face down in a pile of drugs midway through an emotionally hollow Dionysian pansexual orgy yet. 

Call it a hunch, but we get the feeling that Michael Lohan likes women of an unbearably obnoxious bent. Why? Because he managed to have three children with Dina Lohan - a stage-mother so determined to live her life vicariously through her offsprings' psychologically demanding acting and singing careers that they made a TV show about her - and now it turns out that he might have had another kid with a woman named Kristi Kaufmann.

Now, we have no idea who Kristi Kaufmann is - other than the fact that she had a month-long affair with Michael Lohan while he was married and possibly became pregnant with his child - but she's clearly a force to be reckoned with.

Just a few days after her daughter Ashley Kaufman was outed as a possible illegitimate Lohan sister, Kristi Kaufmann h...

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