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- EXTRAORDINARY NUTSACK: Some Ad Dude won a bet with another Ad Dude by managing to include the phrase 'Extraordinary Nutsack' in a commercial for trail mix. (Videogum)
- SAD CLOWNS: Jimmy Kimmel and Sarah Silverman have broken up. Cue a bajillion 'f*cking' jokes. (Gawker)
- WHOREPANTS: Lindsay Lohan's blowjob-ready line of leggings is the biggest must-have slut fashion item since the advent of leopard-print. (Defamer)
- DELICIOUS-SOUNDING THING: French-fry-coated bacon on a stick. It's as if someone looked into my dreams and made them real. (Holy Taco)
- RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Bobby Brown says his relationship with Whitney Houston is 'cordial'. At least as cordial as two ex-crackheads who had a scary reality show about their failed marriage can be. (People)
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