Lohans Unaware of How Ridiculous They Sound

Villainous mother of four Dina Lohan took her 14-year-old daughter Ali (aka Plan B) to CBS' Early Show yesterday to discuss the family's tainted reality show, Living Lohan.

With her forked tongue, Dina said she only agreed to do the reality program to 'diffuse the rumors,' presumably the ones that say she's a money-hungry loon who will do anything to be famous. Then Ali spoke and demonstrated just how deeply she's repressed her memories:

'My sister is so hugely successful,' Ali told Early Show co-anchor Julie Chen. 'I feel like I have to be as good as she is, follow in her footsteps and feel I have to do as good as her. I feel a little nervous and like I have to impress everyone.'

Um, Ali, it's not that hard: Don't twice get caught possessing cocaine while driving drunk and we'll be impressed. Don't become encumbered with some of the biggest daddy issues Hollywood has ever seen and we'll be impressed. Don't kill your mother and we'll be impressed. Win an Oscar? We'll definitely be shocked, but the other stuff is more impressive.

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