John Mayer admits making out with Perez Hilton 'I was thinking about going gay'

Perez Hilton did the talkshow circuit last Spring claiming that he had a makeout session with John Mayer in December, 2006. Perez said he was at a club on New Year's Eve 2006 with Mayer and his then-girlfriend, Jessica Simpson, who was present and witnessed the five minute long tongue kiss, even 'rubbing [Mayer's] crotch' at the time. Mayer's rep denied this incident and called Perez's claim 'completely ridiculous.'

John Mayer had his Mayercraft Concert Cruise over the weekend, a five day long cruise from LA to Mexico which features performances by Mayer and other artists. It is yet another excuse for Mayer to have his ego stroked by adoring fans paying for the privilege. Mayer did a standup comedy routine on the ship in which he admitted that he did make out with Perez. He then he launched into a routine about how he's 'thought about going gay.'

'He has to go tell people that I made out with him at a club. I never said anything, but you know what? Damn right I made out with him at a club. You know why? Because I can't stand a gay guy who acts like he just turned gay yesterday. As soon as a guy is walking around all wild… I will f'ck you in the ass to shut you up. You are not wilder than me. Once you judge me I will go ass to mouth with you just to shut you up. First of all, I was thinking about going gay until you turned into their spokesperson.

'I was thinking about going gay. Every man has thought about going gay. It's usually like.. 2:23 in the morning you wake up. ‘Oh God, interesting!' We seem to leave out the details, don't we guys? Guys like fantasies without the details. ‘Oh yeah, I could blow a dude. Might taste like cherries.' You know that smell at New York Sports Club? The locker room? That's balls….

'The idea of blowing a guy, that's not the problem. The problem is like he'd have some other detail that I didn't think about, like a hangnail or a f'ing class ring knocking into my forehead. Class of 98 just hitting me, or given my predilections Class of 72…

'Whatever, have a good time. Like I don't know this stuff is going to end up somewhere and they're going to act like it's a surprise that it got there. I thought about this shit before I came out… who f'ing cares. Have a good time.'

[Transcribed from Mayer's standup routine on the Mayercraft Carrier, 2009, video above]

There are so many other guys that Mayer could have picked to hook up with, why Perez? He's not the most attractive person inside or out. I bet Mayer sees everything he has in common with the guy and admires how he built an empire out of being a pure unchecked douche.

Mayer wants some more headlines, and talking about his bi-curiousness or bi-ness is going to get that for him. He pretty much admits that at the end of his shtick. I can admire the fact that he's brave enough to admit that he has feelings for other guys, but this is Mayer we're talking about it and he's doing it to get attention. It worked.

Thanks to Gossip Rocks for featuring this video.