The Proposal Hilariously Pretends To Marry The Weekend Box Office

Wow. What a year for comedy it's been. Arguably one of the most successful weekend box office movies of the summer has been The Hangover.

What's more, there have been guaranteed blockbusters like Land Of The Lost and, um… oh, alright, it hasn't been much of year for comedy at the weekend box office. Shut up. However, this weekend two comedy heavyweights went up against each other in direct box office competition - Year One and The Proposal. Who won? It's a secret.

Oh alright, The Proposal did. But only because it was marginally less rubbish than Year One. Shut up.

Of course The Proposal is the weekend box office number one. American audiences love Sandra Bullock. You always know exactly what you're going to get with Sandra Bullock - a lightly funny story about a woman who doesn't love a man, then slowly decides that she does love a man, then faces an obstacle which stops her being able to love the man, then overcomes that obstacle and marries the man. Or a shitty film about how evil the internet is. Or a shitty film about an out-of-control boat. Or Premonition, which we still don't think we understand properly.

But, again, shut up. Let's pretend that Sandra Bullock only makes romantic comedies, because that makes this summary of The Proposal easier. Oh, forget it. Here's the US weekend box office top five:

1 - The Proposal (Great! The Proposal is a huge weekend box office success! That means that Sandra Bullock can go back to doing what she does best - stating that she hates making romantic comedies before making a couple of dreadful serious films that nobody likes and nobody watches before sheepishly making another romantic comedy! Hooray!) $34,114,000

2 - The Hangover (The Hangover appears to be this summer's runaway Wedding Crashers-esque blockbuster comedy. Brilliant! This means that it's only a matter of time before Ed Helms makes a series of increasingly dreary movies based on his increasingly irritating public persona to diminishing commercial results and Bradley Cooper tries to kill himself before making a movie with Jennifer Anist… oh God, it's happening already!) $21,336,000

3 - Up (Next year, Pixar's unique brand of colourful misery continues with Boing!, a movie about a cartoon giraffe slowly dying of septicemia in a Crayola factory) $21,336,000

4 - Year One (Jack Black and Michael Cera make a film where they star as Jack Black and Michael Cera at exactly the point in time where everyone decides that they'd rather shoot themselves in the face than sit through yet another film starring either Jack Black or Michael Cera lazily doing their trademark shtick. Nice timing, guys) $20,200,000

5 - The Taking Of Pelham 1 2 3 (Based on the novel The Taking Of Pelham 3-2-1, where John Travolta attempts to hijack a subway train armed with nothing but a collection of befuddling word association-based riddles and an anthropomorphic dustbin. Note: this joke will only make sense to British readers in their thirties with a good working knowledge of 1980s Saturday teatime ITV gameshows) $11,300,000

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