Elton John Isn't Feeling Well

Some of you may be feeling the pain this morning because you lost an organ (or two) during your weekend of debauchery. Well, shake and bake it off, because you could be laying up in the hospital with an E. coli infection like Elton John.

The Daily Mail reports that Elton was hospitalized over the weekend with a bad case of E. coli bacterial infection and the flu. ACK! We must all refrain from making ten million raw chicken jokes.

Because Elton has the ills, he's been forced to cancel a bunch of concerts in the UK and the United States. Hopefully, Elton will be back on stage in two weeks.

Elton's partner David Furnish said he was out of the hospital and doing well. Elton's rep issued this statement: "He is recovering from a case of serious influenza with minor complications. We are confident he will be back on stage in the near future."

Those of you who wanted to send flowers should send a balloon basket instead, because I'm sure a dozen floral shops have already moved into Elton's house. Git well soon, Elton!